TheQuietOne in topic Begging
“I want you to fuck me.”
Begging is something that often seems extremely daunting, but the concepts behind good begging, at least, are very simple.
The most difficult aspect of it is vulnerability. You are opening yourself up and admitting things that are usually considered shameful, and that is something which can cause it to be a scary concept. Unfortunately (for you) the best way to combat this is to simply dive in at the deep end. Once you are past the initial shock, continuing in that vein is both easier and more pleasurable.
But how does one dive in at the deep end? It is easy to imagine dirty talk - it pervades most porn, after all - but when one tries to start, it is easy to become tongue-tied. Therefore I offer the five steps I consider most key to begging, or simply dirty-talk in general:
Pause
Specify
Describe
Speak
Rephrase and Repeat
Pause
It is very rare for dirty-talk to come easily, and the biggest stopping point for most people is when they want to begin but have that sudden realisation ‘I don’t know what to say’. Feeling awkward and unsure is not a sexy feeling (often even if humiliation is your thing) and this causes most people to abort. The best thing that you can do before you start is to pause, take a breath and give yourself the time you need to think, rather than trying to rush.
Specify
So, we are giving ourselves time to think, but where do we go from here. Porn stars may cry out “spank me, daddy, mmm fuck me harder, yeah” but there is a distinct lack of depth there. Therefore we bring it back to the most basic of elements:
WHO
are you talking to? Starting with your dominant’s title can be a good way to ease yourself into dirty talk, most connotations to such things are already sexual, so it helps to build upon those pathways.
are you? Your title matters too - how is it that you class yourself in your fantasies? Are you a slut, fucktoy, little? Using third person to refer to yourself can help to both add layers to what you are saying and allow you to take a step away - it’s not [Amy Gardener] talking anymore, it's [Sir’s dirty little fuckhole].
WHAT
do you want to happen? “I want you to fuck me” is a little trite. This is the best use of your pause, to think of exactly what it is you want. You’ve had fantasies before, you’ve imagined things while masturbating, or watched porn; I am certain that you have a few ideas of what you want. Think back to the title, be specific. “I want you to fuck me,” becomes “I want you to shove your cock into my pussy,” and already it feels so much better, but can we add more layers? “I want you to force my legs apart, grab my throat and shove your cock into my pussy!” This is the most difficult part in terms of making yourself vulnerable, but that is why we are giving ourselves time to get our story straight.
WHEN
do you want this to end? The ‘when’ can often be misconstrued. Often you are talking to someone who is right in front of you, or else a long distance away, and saying “I want this now now now” can be difficult. Instead I would use this in the context of when you want it to ‘stop’ “until I’m soaked/I scream/I beg for mercy/I squirm/you fill me up with your cum”. You can also take this in other directions, as these are all fairly ‘continuous’, for example: “then stop so that you can see how desperate you make me/then leave me begging for more/then laugh at how badly I need you.” suddenly we’ve transformed it from a more general ‘fuck me’ desire into begging to be teased.
WHERE
on your body? We addressed this somewhat in the ‘what’ section in terms of being more specific, but this is also a good area to focus on in terms of breadth. It is easy to fall into the three-holes-trap and forget that there are many other areas to your body that can be pleasurable for both you and your dominant. Perhaps they could pull you by the hair, roughly pinch your cheek, whisper in your ear, grab your throat, make use of your hands, squeeze your ass, spread your thighs, hold your ankles, tickle your feet.
in your location? Location is a criminally underused factor. Take a look about your surroundings and consider, obviously we have the easy go-to: “on my/your bed” but we can go further than that. On a desk or chair? Kitchen surfaces? Could you kneel on the floor, or perhaps there is some sort of chair or other small piece of furniture you could use as a prop? This can extend to fantasy as well, presuming that your dominant has some sense. While you might not mean it, “I want you to take me outside and fuck me in an alley like the trash whore I am” is very hot.
WHY
do you want this? Once again it is easy to fall into the obvious trap of some variation of “I am a desperate slut”, which is a nice sentiment but once again a little insipid. Take the time during your pause to be introspective and try and consider what emotion it is that you particularly crave. Some form of gratification or humiliation, yes, but can you go deeper than that? Is it that you want to feel like a slut, rather than your normal ‘good girl’ persona? Is it that you want to feel worthless, as if you are little more than a streetwhore, or an animal pet, or even an object? Do you want to feel dirty? Used? Broken? Weak? Helpless? If it is gratification you are seeking, then why do you want to be fucked? Are you desperate to be filled, do you want to be a dirty princess, do you specifically want to feel them inside you?
HOW
is it affecting you? What effect is this desire having on your body and mind. Is it making you wet? Are you panting? Perhaps you’re so hot, or throbbing with desire. Are you empty? Are your nipples hard? Are you unable to focus on anything else? Are you going crazy, or are you just so ready to be used?
Once you have all of these, it is time to combine them and find that we’ve taken the rather basic sentiment of “I want you to fuck me” and by grabbing a random selection from each category, we can turn that into something far more substantial:
“Sir, your dirty little fuckhole wants you to force her legs apart, grab her throat and rub your cock against her pussy until she begs you to push her over your desk and fuck her senseless so that she can’t hide what a whore she is from the world any more. It’s driving me crazy, I need it so bad.”
Somewhat more powerful, yes?
Describe
Now is time for the garnish. You have your overall idea, now we just need to ‘dirty it up’ a little and the best way to do that is to… use a thesaurus?
I’m not even kidding.
If you want homework from this, grab some fancy paper, nice pens and scissors and have a think about what words you think appeal most to you. Dirty? Humiliated? Worthless? Weak? Needy? Create a word cloud for each one, cut them out and practice putting some of them together with requests. To list a few examples for “dirty” alone that get disappointingly little use we have: filthy, nasty, base, contemptible, despicable, immoral, impure, indecent, lewd, risqué, salacious, smutty, sordid, vile, and vulgar. Some of these have much heavier meanings than others, however, so I would advise making sure that you’re comfortable with the exact definitions before using them.
Adding a few swears can help to add a little spice as well, so let's see where this takes us:
“Sir, your dirty little fuckhole wants you to force her legs apart, grab her fucking throat and rub your cock against her tight, wet, little cunt until she begs you to push her over your desk and fuck her senseless so that she can’t hide what a disgusting whore she is from the world any more. It’s driving me crazy, I need it so fucking bad.”
Speak
Now comes the easy (or hard) part, saying it aloud (or typing it out). A lot of subs find this difficult because they want their dom to be in charge, and by being so specific they take away from that; however it is important to remember that by begging you are making a demand at most in the form of a request. It is up to your dom how they interpret that request (if they do at all), you do not take any power by telling them what you want. In fact, you actually give more control to them - they now have a better understanding of what you want, why you want it. The better they understand your thought process, the better they can control you and cause you however much pleasure or frustration they desire.
But that is it. You know everything that you are going to say, the words are all there. Go.
Rephrase and Repeat
Now that you have spoken the words… what next? Moving topic is not the right answer, especially if you are begging for something - this is something you have thought about carefully, something you want. This is when your more basic elements can come into play, the repetition of ‘please’ and ‘I need it’, because we have a basis on which to build. Focus on this one idea, this thing is what you need, and if you can convince them totally enough maybe you might get it.
Let’s look at how this works in one final comparative example:
“Please fuck me. Please! I need to be fucked, I want it so bad! Please fuck me! I want to be fucked so hard, please!”
“Sir, your dirty little fuckhole wants you to force her legs apart, grab her fucking throat and rub your cock against her tight, wet, little cunt until she begs you to push her over your desk and fuck her senseless so that she can’t hide what a disgusting whore she is from the world any more. It’s driving me crazy, I need it so fucking bad. Please, Sir, please show this whore that she can’t keep her legs together and hide her cunt. Use me, Sir, please, I need it. I need to be shown what I am. I don’t deserve a bed, please, this desk will do fine, Sir, I need to feel you rubbing against me so bad. I’m already so wet!”
Begging is something that often seems extremely daunting, but the concepts behind good begging, at least, are very simple.
The most difficult aspect of it is vulnerability. You are opening yourself up and admitting things that are usually considered shameful, and that is something which can cause it to be a scary concept. Unfortunately (for you) the best way to combat this is to simply dive in at the deep end. Once you are past the initial shock, continuing in that vein is both easier and more pleasurable.
But how does one dive in at the deep end? It is easy to imagine dirty talk - it pervades most porn, after all - but when one tries to start, it is easy to become tongue-tied. Therefore I offer the five steps I consider most key to begging, or simply dirty-talk in general:
Pause
Specify
Describe
Speak
Rephrase and Repeat
Pause
It is very rare for dirty-talk to come easily, and the biggest stopping point for most people is when they want to begin but have that sudden realisation ‘I don’t know what to say’. Feeling awkward and unsure is not a sexy feeling (often even if humiliation is your thing) and this causes most people to abort. The best thing that you can do before you start is to pause, take a breath and give yourself the time you need to think, rather than trying to rush.
Specify
So, we are giving ourselves time to think, but where do we go from here. Porn stars may cry out “spank me, daddy, mmm fuck me harder, yeah” but there is a distinct lack of depth there. Therefore we bring it back to the most basic of elements:
WHO
are you talking to? Starting with your dominant’s title can be a good way to ease yourself into dirty talk, most connotations to such things are already sexual, so it helps to build upon those pathways.
are you? Your title matters too - how is it that you class yourself in your fantasies? Are you a slut, fucktoy, little? Using third person to refer to yourself can help to both add layers to what you are saying and allow you to take a step away - it’s not [Amy Gardener] talking anymore, it's [Sir’s dirty little fuckhole].
WHAT
do you want to happen? “I want you to fuck me” is a little trite. This is the best use of your pause, to think of exactly what it is you want. You’ve had fantasies before, you’ve imagined things while masturbating, or watched porn; I am certain that you have a few ideas of what you want. Think back to the title, be specific. “I want you to fuck me,” becomes “I want you to shove your cock into my pussy,” and already it feels so much better, but can we add more layers? “I want you to force my legs apart, grab my throat and shove your cock into my pussy!” This is the most difficult part in terms of making yourself vulnerable, but that is why we are giving ourselves time to get our story straight.
WHEN
do you want this to end? The ‘when’ can often be misconstrued. Often you are talking to someone who is right in front of you, or else a long distance away, and saying “I want this now now now” can be difficult. Instead I would use this in the context of when you want it to ‘stop’ “until I’m soaked/I scream/I beg for mercy/I squirm/you fill me up with your cum”. You can also take this in other directions, as these are all fairly ‘continuous’, for example: “then stop so that you can see how desperate you make me/then leave me begging for more/then laugh at how badly I need you.” suddenly we’ve transformed it from a more general ‘fuck me’ desire into begging to be teased.
WHERE
on your body? We addressed this somewhat in the ‘what’ section in terms of being more specific, but this is also a good area to focus on in terms of breadth. It is easy to fall into the three-holes-trap and forget that there are many other areas to your body that can be pleasurable for both you and your dominant. Perhaps they could pull you by the hair, roughly pinch your cheek, whisper in your ear, grab your throat, make use of your hands, squeeze your ass, spread your thighs, hold your ankles, tickle your feet.
in your location? Location is a criminally underused factor. Take a look about your surroundings and consider, obviously we have the easy go-to: “on my/your bed” but we can go further than that. On a desk or chair? Kitchen surfaces? Could you kneel on the floor, or perhaps there is some sort of chair or other small piece of furniture you could use as a prop? This can extend to fantasy as well, presuming that your dominant has some sense. While you might not mean it, “I want you to take me outside and fuck me in an alley like the trash whore I am” is very hot.
WHY
do you want this? Once again it is easy to fall into the obvious trap of some variation of “I am a desperate slut”, which is a nice sentiment but once again a little insipid. Take the time during your pause to be introspective and try and consider what emotion it is that you particularly crave. Some form of gratification or humiliation, yes, but can you go deeper than that? Is it that you want to feel like a slut, rather than your normal ‘good girl’ persona? Is it that you want to feel worthless, as if you are little more than a streetwhore, or an animal pet, or even an object? Do you want to feel dirty? Used? Broken? Weak? Helpless? If it is gratification you are seeking, then why do you want to be fucked? Are you desperate to be filled, do you want to be a dirty princess, do you specifically want to feel them inside you?
HOW
is it affecting you? What effect is this desire having on your body and mind. Is it making you wet? Are you panting? Perhaps you’re so hot, or throbbing with desire. Are you empty? Are your nipples hard? Are you unable to focus on anything else? Are you going crazy, or are you just so ready to be used?
Once you have all of these, it is time to combine them and find that we’ve taken the rather basic sentiment of “I want you to fuck me” and by grabbing a random selection from each category, we can turn that into something far more substantial:
“Sir, your dirty little fuckhole wants you to force her legs apart, grab her throat and rub your cock against her pussy until she begs you to push her over your desk and fuck her senseless so that she can’t hide what a whore she is from the world any more. It’s driving me crazy, I need it so bad.”
Somewhat more powerful, yes?
Describe
Now is time for the garnish. You have your overall idea, now we just need to ‘dirty it up’ a little and the best way to do that is to… use a thesaurus?
I’m not even kidding.
If you want homework from this, grab some fancy paper, nice pens and scissors and have a think about what words you think appeal most to you. Dirty? Humiliated? Worthless? Weak? Needy? Create a word cloud for each one, cut them out and practice putting some of them together with requests. To list a few examples for “dirty” alone that get disappointingly little use we have: filthy, nasty, base, contemptible, despicable, immoral, impure, indecent, lewd, risqué, salacious, smutty, sordid, vile, and vulgar. Some of these have much heavier meanings than others, however, so I would advise making sure that you’re comfortable with the exact definitions before using them.
Adding a few swears can help to add a little spice as well, so let's see where this takes us:
“Sir, your dirty little fuckhole wants you to force her legs apart, grab her fucking throat and rub your cock against her tight, wet, little cunt until she begs you to push her over your desk and fuck her senseless so that she can’t hide what a disgusting whore she is from the world any more. It’s driving me crazy, I need it so fucking bad.”
Speak
Now comes the easy (or hard) part, saying it aloud (or typing it out). A lot of subs find this difficult because they want their dom to be in charge, and by being so specific they take away from that; however it is important to remember that by begging you are making a demand at most in the form of a request. It is up to your dom how they interpret that request (if they do at all), you do not take any power by telling them what you want. In fact, you actually give more control to them - they now have a better understanding of what you want, why you want it. The better they understand your thought process, the better they can control you and cause you however much pleasure or frustration they desire.
But that is it. You know everything that you are going to say, the words are all there. Go.
Rephrase and Repeat
Now that you have spoken the words… what next? Moving topic is not the right answer, especially if you are begging for something - this is something you have thought about carefully, something you want. This is when your more basic elements can come into play, the repetition of ‘please’ and ‘I need it’, because we have a basis on which to build. Focus on this one idea, this thing is what you need, and if you can convince them totally enough maybe you might get it.
Let’s look at how this works in one final comparative example:
“Please fuck me. Please! I need to be fucked, I want it so bad! Please fuck me! I want to be fucked so hard, please!”
“Sir, your dirty little fuckhole wants you to force her legs apart, grab her fucking throat and rub your cock against her tight, wet, little cunt until she begs you to push her over your desk and fuck her senseless so that she can’t hide what a disgusting whore she is from the world any more. It’s driving me crazy, I need it so fucking bad. Please, Sir, please show this whore that she can’t keep her legs together and hide her cunt. Use me, Sir, please, I need it. I need to be shown what I am. I don’t deserve a bed, please, this desk will do fine, Sir, I need to feel you rubbing against me so bad. I’m already so wet!”
